The Efficiency Pack™
Introducing the Latest Ficsit Technological Breakthroughs: The Efficiency Pack™ Here at Ficsit, we are proud to present not one, but two groundbreaking innovations designed to push your productivity into overdrive (and maybe your sanity to the limit)! 1. SqueezeWorks™ Factory: Double the Power, Double the Fun! Finally, we’ve done the unthinkable. Our brilliant scientists have developed a way to squeeze not just one, but two power shards from a single slug! Yes, you heard that right. With our top-secret and definitely-not-suspicious process (don’t ask how, we legally can’t say), you can now unlock unprecedented power efficiency. Just build the all-new SqueezeWorks™ and watch as we literally extract every last drop of energy from the humble power slug. * SqueezeWorks™ is a mandatory installation across all planetsides. Failure to comply may lead to loss of power, resources, and possibly your dignity. ** Requires SommerloopTech™ to function. Trust us, it’s complicated but worth it. 2. Alien Remains DNA Extractor: Because Why Waste a Good Corpse? Our second innovation is another leap forward in Ficsit ingenuity—introducing the Super-Efficient Alien Remains DNA Extractor™! Using this highly confidential, patented technology, you can extract and calibrate the DNA of every alien species you "encounter" (wink wink). We’ve revolutionized DNA extraction to maximize efficiency—just one calibration per species type, and you’re set for life! But remember, DO NOT SHARE this confidential patent process or you will be held personally and legally responsible (and trust us, you do NOT want to mess with our legal team). The Efficiency Pack™—Only Available to Authorized Pioneers Both of these cutting-edge technologies are available now as part of our exclusive Efficiency Pack™. Together, these innovations will skyrocket your production and leave the competition in the dust. * Ficsit holds no liability for overworked pioneers, malfunctioning slugs, or accidental alien cloning mishaps. Build responsibly. ** All patents and technologies are strictly confidential. We know where you live.
